Up and Down

Today was my first day at the new church and I had a good time. I didn't preach, which was a little odd, but sat in the congregation and worshipped with them. Got the gift of listening to a sermon by a retired United Methodist DS from the Troy Conference, soon to not exist -- the Conference not the pastor. Got drafted into the choir the minute I walked in the door and instead of leading it, was singing with about fifteen other guys in a men's patriotic sing. I haven't sung in all all male chorus in a long time, another gift.

Home was another story. I hit the wall today. Couldn't think, could do anything. My whole life seemed unmanageable and we got homesick, did things for the kids that were totally unappreciated. Couldn't find anything I wanted. Set up some stuff that mostly didn't work and didn't get anything done that I needed to.

I know from experience that there will be more days like this, and that most days won't be like this -- things get better. I am sure I will miss Morgan Hill forever, just like I miss the people in Fort Bragg and Boulder Creek. It is part of the process of loving and moving on in ministry.

But today, I am feeling heavy.